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C. Agee

When the news broke late last week that North Pole Incorporated, (NYSE: NPLI) was filing suit against most of the world’s gas fireplace manufacturers, the shock was palpable. With Christmas just around the corner, this debate about fireplaces has taken the world by storm.

During a press conference, Lester Elfberg, Chief Legal Counsel for North Pole laid out his company’s grievance. “We at North Pole take Christmas very seriously, for obvious reasons. For centuries our company has had a mutually beneficial agreement, with the manufacturers of fireplaces, known as the Claus Accord. The current trends towards gas fireplaces that depend on either direct-vent or ventless systems are in obvious breach of this agreement. North Pole wishes to make it clear, we are not suing to prevent people from buying these fireplaces, rather we are suing for a safe alternative. This is about North Pole’s relationships with our customers and the health of our beloved CEO.”

The suit itself includes allegations of discrimination, breach of contract, and unsafe working conditions. The crux of the case hinges on whether or not North Pole’s celebrity CEO, Santa Claus, is able to make use of gas fireplaces during the company’s annual holiday celebration. A member of one of the manufacturing companies, speaking on a condition of anonymity due to the pending trial, had this to say, “We all take Santa’s safety very seriously. But let’s face facts; this is North Pole trying to tell us how to do our jobs. The man in red has no problem getting into apartments without fireplaces.”

A commercial, traced to the public action group People for Affordable Fireplaces, titled “Scrooge” paints a rather unflattering picture of Santa. The commercial, which a majority of fireplace manufacturers have come out against, alleges that Santa is seeking to profit from the increased sale of affordable gas fireplaces by forcing chimneys, driving a wedge between those who can afford a fireplace, and those who must go without. As the commercial states “Just because you can’t afford a chimney, doesn’t mean you can’t afford a fireplace. Don’t let Santa be a fireplace Scrooge.”

Pro-Santa supporters have been reacting to both the suit and the commercial with unwavering support for the man with the trademark laugh. “Look, Christmas is hard work. Santa has to fly all over the world and deliver presents. He’s got to juggle a huge list of who’s been good and who hasn’t, and all he asks for in return is for houses to have a chimney a certain width! What’s so wrong with that?” asked mall Santa, and pro-Santa pundit Jeffery Kerns of NorthPoleOhio.com.

The argument is quickly spreading, occupying the television, the internet, and the editorial sections of newspapers across the country. Several malls in America have had protestors removed for causing a scene. Fake fireplaces, complete with chimneys, are looking like they might become this year’s hottest lawn decoration. But, there is one noted area of silence

Peter Garant

George Bernard Shaw once said,

Nirjara Rustom

Humour (or humor, if you prefer) is the tendency to induce or provoke laughter or amusement in someone to make him or her laugh or smile, showing acceptance of amusement. The degree to which that person will find something humorous will depend on a lot of factors that include but are not limited to: age, gender, intelligence, maturity, education, culture, upbringing, geographical location, religion, context and health (physical, mental and spiritual).

There are many benefits of having a good sense of humour. Some of these are:

1. The restorative power of humor is also widely documented and can be found in many medical journals.

2. Humor is a good ice breaker when you

Dr. E.Z. Streat

There are all kinds of excuses used in Fake Doctors Notes. Whether you are designing your own excuse slip or shopping for one, it is important that you select the best excuse that will work for you. This page gives you some idea of what options are available.

Why can

Mike Girolami

One thing we can all agree on is that the economy is hurting all of us, especially the working people. With gas prices soaring, medications costing more than our utility bills even with insurance coverage, and the price of everything at the local supermarket jumping by leaps and bounds, we all have to be more conscientious about price than ever before. And that

Dr. E.Z. Streat

Doctor CREDIBLE MEDICAL EXCUSES FOR THE ABSENT EMPLOYEE

Reasons for taking time off work vary. Be it a family emergency, a medical condition, a misunderstanding with a co-worker, a hangover or a much needed break from stress employees everywhere and anywhere from the supervisors down to the rank and file will always have reasons to absent themselves. Unfortunately for most companies, employees take time off from work usually for reasons that are just unacceptable in a professional environment. Most of the time the more credible excuses are medical and should come with a doctor note.

The more common and credible excuses used by employees would include the common cold or the flu. Because it is infectious in nature, employees with colds or flu are usually allowed to stay at home in order to keep co-workers from catching the virus. Those with colds and flu are usually advised a day or two of bedrest as well as medication and plenty of fluids.

Physical injuries such as sprains and muscle strains are also common medical excuses especially if it effectively prevents the employee from performing the current job. A doctor note for injuries may require some amount of home stay and rest as well as special instructions on certain tasks that employees may or may not perform. A doctor note may contain for example certain limitations in terms of the number of hours an employee can stand or as to how heavy a weight the employee can carry. These instructions would of course depend on how severe the injury is. Other related excuses would be severe back pains and other muscular pains and injuries.

Another common medical excuse that an absent employee may present in a doctor note would be intestinal or abdominal pain or discomfort, usually caused by food poisoning and diarrhea. Dehydration resulting from such illnesses can make the employee severely weak. Moreover, the discomfort can also be distracting at work and may compel you to use toilet facilities every so often. For these type of illness a doctor note may recommend another day or two rest.

Skin allergies and infectious skin diseases are also common medical excuses for absences from work. Carbuncles and boils which aside from being painful, can also infect a co-worker are valid excuses that may be placed in a doctor note. Carbuncles take a while but it will not be until its last stages that the pain will become unbearable. This entails minor surgery but will not get you off work for more than a day.

Other acceptable medical excuses are however more difficult to make up because of its severity and extent. Of course if your illness genuinely requires hospitalization then you are more than excused from work

But whatever the reason and whatever the excuse, what’s more important is that you have a good doctor note to back you up. Most of the time unless employees present their doctor note, their absences incur consequences ranging from salary deductions to termination. If you’re faking it a credible doctor note can be found and purchased online, complete with a hospital and clinic logo as well as physician details, contact information and signature.

Dr E.Z. Streat runs a credible doctor note website. Visit his site to learn more about doctors notes.

Emma Vasquez

Fake college diplomas have become quite the collector

Simon Barrett

When I glanced at the cover, I mistakenly assumed this was going to be some kind of self help and diet book. A writing genre that induces a comatose state in me after page 2!

I was completely off base, Embracing Your Big Fat Ass is a wonderfully funny look at the how we perceive that others might view our

Nahshon Roberts

What do you do when confronted with the sight of a CCTV security camera? Do you go on as if it is a speck on the wall worthy of your attention as a, well, speck on the wall? Do you ponder it for a moment, wonder who is watching you watching him and then wander somewhere else with nary a second glance?

Whatever you do, never ever do these things if you value your sanity, your dignity, your levity, and most important, your life. (Unless of course, you are inside Big Brother

Robert Kane

Marijuana users have always sought legal loopholes in countries where it is illegal to own or smoke it. Many people choose to buy marijuana seeds (which is legal in many places), then grow and smoke their own (which is not!) But every marijuana smoker has probably dreamed at one point or another of living in a country where marijuana is legal